Emerald Playthrough Part 2: Whatever.

Yeah, I’m only going far enough to get the ‘Dex.

August 11^th

Well, let’s set off on a…GRAND ADVENTURE!!11!!!!1!!1 I’m walking, I’m walking, I’m-HOLY CRAP, A WILD POKE’MON APPEARED! Let’s kick the shit out of it! Let’s do the same with the other two Wurmple, and two Poochyena that show up. Oh wow, Leif went up two levels and learned Absorb in the process. Nothing like sucking the life out of your opponents to make you feel empowered.

Oh hay, we’re in Oldale town. There better be some actual ale or I’ll kill someone. First, lets get Leif back in fighting condition and then-oh…some weirdo dragged me to the front of a store. Okay, now I’m freaked out. Wait…he’s giving me a potion? SCORE! Oh, it’s for my Poke’Mon. Well, shit. Oh well, let’s buy eight more, and head out. Huh, some nerd’s blocking the left path, guess I’ll head north. Oh, wow, more wild critters. Oh hay, there’s May…staring vacantly at the grass. What the-battle, here, now? Damn, she moves fast. What the hell?! A fire type?! Fuck. I’m gonna get my ass handed to me. …It doesn’t know any fire type moves. HA HA HA! Piece of fucking cake. She gave me three hundred Poke dollars for winning? I think I like this whole battling thing. Aw…she left. Guess I’ve got nowhere else to go, so I’ll head to the lab.

Ooh, neat, a high tec encyclopedia. Yay. Why yes professor, I’ll go on a quest to do your fucking job. Just let me take a while to blow it off.

I’ll post more whenever I don’t feel entirely bored with this game. I might take some suggestions on what critters to catch, which ones to use in Gyms, and which six will make up my final team. Maybe that’ll make it a little more interesting.

Poke’Mon Emerald Playthrough Part One: Have Poke’Mon, Will Travel.

Ooh, new category! I’ve decided to chronicle my video game playthroughs.

August 10^th

I’ve never noticed this before, but Professor Birch looks kinda like my father. Weird…Oh right, gender and name. I’m not the posterboy for change, so I’ll stick with the guy. I promise I’ll choose the female for my Fire Red playthrough.

 

Blah blah blah, Poke’Mon are living things, I’m a BOY named DARIUS, blah blah blah. Apparently, I’m fond of names that start with D. I’m ready to-HOLY SHIT, I’M SHRINKING! Oh, wait…that’s just an overhead view. I’m riding in the back of the moving truck. What kind of mother makes her only child ride in the back of the moving truck? That’s real Mother of the Year material right there. But then again, I’m the only one with a bed, so I guess I could cut her some slack. The in-game room is pretty nice. Wonder if DAD is up there…nope, but he left me a wall clock. Oh boy, I get to set it myself! Thanks DAD!

Wow, I’m a fast unpacker. everything’s in it’s place, and hooked up within a minute. Why is there a potion in my PC? Why do I even have a potion? Oh right…I had one left over from my farwell party in Johto. Guess I passed out before I could drink the last one. *sniff* Good times, good times. DAD’s on TV, big deal. He hardly ever visits, why should I give a rat’s ass? Fine, I’ll go visit this Birch guy.

Wow, I just barge right into his house. Oh, he has a daughter? Alright, I’ll go “talk” to her. Hmm…seems he’s out studying wild Poke’Mon. I’ll venture outside the saftey of this podunk little town and find him. Oh…hahaha. It takes a real genius to piss off a Zigzagoon. Ooh…he’s lettin’ me use a Poke’Mon. Let’s see…random choice time! …Neat, a Treecko! Let’s start of with Leer…the fuzzball used Growl. Fine, how about another Leer? THAT ROTTEN LITTLE BASTARD! He used growl again! Fine, I’ll try Leer one more time…HA! Your Tackle only tickles me! Pounded into submission you furry little shit! Whoa, I’m in the old man’s lab now. Hur hur hur, I named my Treecko LEIF. I’m so witty.

That’s it for today. I’ll post more tomorrow. I’ll probably be going all the way to Petalburg Woods, maybe Rustboro.

I gots my new chair!!!11!!1

I also had the pleasure of assembling it myself. Normally, I would’ve gotten anybody but myself to do it, but I was determined. I felt all useful and shit when I didn’t fuck it up.

Also, I think I have some form of second sight. I haven’t really given it a second thought until now, but there have been countless times I’ve had a massive feeling of Deja Vu. I’d either dream, daydream, or consider multiple outcomes to something going on in my life, and I end up living that scenario, every little detail intact. Maybe they’re all just coincidences, maybe not, but it weirds me out every time.

Typos fixed, and my chair tried to kill me.

I corrected all the typos I found in every post since I created this blog, oh, and one of the legs on my desk chair snapped, and I got to say hi to the floor. This happens on the day I contemplate spending fifty bucks on a spiffy office chair that’s on sale at Office Max until Saturday. I’d say the choice is quite obvious now.

Where the fuck do they keep disappearing to?

In recent times I’ve been losing track of my games more often. About three months ago, I lost my copy of Megaman Starforce Leo Version. I could not find it, no matter how hard I looked. More recently, I yearned to play Paper Mario, and the Thousand Year Door. Now, I just recently moved, so it would be understandable if it was in one of the many boxes I packed, and not the box it was previously in, on my shelf. Thinking it was left at my previous house, I went back, and scoured the area. No luck. I came back here, and scoured the boxes not stored in the basment. No luck. I went back to the other house, and looked again. I found my copy of Megaman Starforce, but no Paper Mario. I returned, and checked every box in the basement. No fucking luck. I have decided to buy another copy, and just as soon as I do that, the old copy will turn up.

These losses seem to be escalating:

Years ago-GameBoy Color game was lost and never found

Months ago-DS game lost, and then found

Weeks/Days? ago-Gamecube game lost

I swear to all that is holy, if I lose a home console, I’m going to fucking chain the others to the TV, and lock the games in a fucking safe.

 

Oh yeah, I’ll also be going through every post tonight or tomorrow, correcting any typos I find. Also, EchoNetwork is dead. I’ll just remove that link. I might add a few more links when I sweep for typos.

Fucking morons; I’ve got them.

They just keep appearing.

So, I get Charter DVR for my non-HiDef television. I’m told Everything will work, but it won’t be a super high quality picture. I’m fine with that. What I’m not fine with is the DVR functions moving at a fucking snail’s pace for a fucking week. But, that corrected itself, and all was good in my home…for about four days. Some idiot comes out, and says service for the house next to me is being cut. That house is vacant, and I figure it’s probably a previous tenant’s former service. Then the fucking moron starts disconnecting my service. When I call him on it, he said he told me that mine was being disconnected, which should not be happening. I set the umpteenth moron Charter has so graciously sent my way straight. That’s at around 7:15 A.M. I go about my day, and notice that the time on the DVR box is stuck on 7:15, when it is 11:45. None of the DVR functions work, so I reboot it. Now, roughly half the channels I normally get are replaced with the “If you do not subscribe to this channel” message. Now I’ve got to wait about half a day for it to correct itself.

I have to the conclusion that at least ninety percent of Charters employee’s are morons.

Apparently, there’s a downside to my newfound glee.

That downside is having to flip a switch in the fuse box if I leave my PC on while my TV is on, or leaving my air conditioner on while my Wii is being played. Yeah, this is gonna be a very frustrating summer.

That’s it. I have nothing more to post about now, and I’m too busy being assaulted by the summer heat to rant about this.

The universe apparently likes me now.

It’s been over a month since my last post, but then again, that’s normal for me.

So, the house I was going to get is a thing of the past. The landlord dicked me around for nearly eight months, knowing he wasn’t going to rent it to me, so I found a new landlord, one who actually maintains his properties. I’m all moved in, with just minor upacking, and other little things left to be done. The place is smaller, but that doesn’t really matter. Oh, yes, I’ve finally got my Wii online. More on that below. No, it didn’t take me a month to move in. It only took a little more than two weeks. I’m just lazy.

So, I’ve experienced about ten minutes of Wi-Fi with my Wii. That was a glorious ten minutes. I will be dowlonloading at least ten Virtual Consoles games, and two Wiiware programs. SD memory cards will be used, Wiipoints will be spent, and I shall be quite happy. Oh, yes, Super Mario Galaxy is splendid. Despite it being THE Mario game for the Wii, mimicing all the other major Mario titles in many ways, and being yet another Mario game, it is splendid, magnificent, and wonderful. This time, I may actually conquer a Mario title. I haven’t done that since Super Mario World for the SNES.

I am in my happy place, and will hopefully stay there for quite awhile.

Less than 3 hours of sleep in the last three days+morons=equals very unstable me.

Anyone who knows me well IRL has experienced, or been told by someone who has experienced a few moments with me when I’ve been stricken with insomnia. I’m normally a wise ass, with a dislike for anyone who gives the rest of the human species a bad name. With insomnia, I’m worse. Much. Worse. If somebody does something that annoys me during an attack of insomnia, there is a strong chance that I will attack them. Usually, it’s only verbal, but their have been cases where I could not restrain myself, and physically attacked someone. So far, it’s only been people who deserve a good beating. I don’t feel bad about it. Infact, last time this happened, I was filled in about my attack on some moron who thought harassing a neighbor kid was funny. I enjoyed the tale. Earlier tonight, I was just simply relaxing with some friends. We were on the porch, I was slumped in a chair, and a casual conversation was being enjoyed by all. The dilweed I mentioned back in the May 11th post entitled “Here’s A Handy Tip” shows up. He decides to head straight towards me. I glare at the fucker, one of my friends notices. He issues a warning: Don’t poke the bear. Idiot ignores warning, and stomps up to me. He may be a moron, but I do have to admit, he’s ballsy.

That didn’t help him. The isntant the little wannabe spoke the word “Jackass”, he was down, holding his crotch. When someone says don’t poke the bear, don’t fucking poke the bear! And for the love of all that is holy, don’t get back up and attempt to hit the bear. You’ll only end up with multiple bruises, and a fractured rib or two. Please, don’t make death threats, either. I will retrieve my dented shovel from the shed, sit in front of my television, and give you a fucking concussion when you break into my home! Mommy can’t save your ass from jail time, especially when I have four witnesses, who just happened to crash at my place because they give a rat’s ass about my well being.

Two posts in one day.

Yeah, these little online rants help a bit, but if something isn’t done soon, I’m gonna have a nervous breakdown, and kill the guy. I am referring to my housing situation. As anyone who reads this blog may recall, I recently mentioned something about moving, and very little work being done on getting the place up to snuff. That was over a month ago, and nothing, fucking nothing has been done since then! Seven months, seven fucking months! I have waited seven goddamned months, and what is supposed to be my new home isn’t ready! It could have been torn down, rebuilt from scratch, and fully fucking furnished by now! One man could have did all that, yet it’s only the inside that needs work, and he won’t be furnishing it, only making repairs, and replacements! Oh, yeah, I’m paying bills up there, too. Lighting, and heating. In order for him to let me get the electricity turned on, so a few lights could be left on to make it seemed ‘lived in’ so the jackasses who have been breaking into homes on my street will refrain from ripping off the stuff I have stored there due to myself being broke, and having nowhere else to store it, I had to pay the heating bill, so he could have a comfortable environment to work in.

HE’S HARDLY DONE ANY FUCKING WORK AT ALL!!!!! I’M PAYING DOUBLE FUCKING LIGHTING AND HEATING BILLS, AND WILL BE FOR THE THREE FUCKING YEARS IT TAKES HIM TO FINISH THE PLACE!!!! HE WON’T FUCKING HIRE ANY HELP, BECAUSE HE DOESN’T TRUST ANYONE, AND I CAN’T FUCKING TELL HIM TO MOVE HIS ASS BECAUSE HE’S A FRIEND OF THE FAMILY ON MY FATHER’S SIDE, AND THAT WOULD SCREW UP HIS HOUSING ARRANGEMENT, BECAUSE WE HAVE THE SAME DAMNED LANDLORD!!!!!!!!!!! NO, I JUST HAVE TO FUCKING TAKE IT, AND LET MY RAGE FESTER UNTIL I GET SO DAMNED STRESSED, I WIND UP WITH A PEPTIC ULCER!!!!

It’s at the point where I get fucking enraged at anything having to do with home makeovers, building houses, or even seeing a nice home on television. Finding an apartment, or someone else to rent from is not an option, because this is the only deal I can afford right now, and the fucker thinks he can dick me around because of that!!!

Don’t believe me about the ulcers: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peptic_ulcer Scroll down to the “Stress and Ulcers” passage.